WHY DO I DO IT?

A practice painting of a Gladiolus spike using Adelene Fletcher's book "The Watercolor Flower Painter's A to Z" .

It's the time of year when state taxes are due for me. I struggle annually to account to the state of California my total sales, my expenditures, my profits; and State Board of Equalization's fair share. Unfortunately, every year, the sales report generates a question I ask myself.

"Why am I doing this? "

I'm too old and disabled to enlarge my business. It's too late for me to hustle and work toward expanding my horizons in order to get into the textile business or stationery business. My work will never be found at Target or Nordstrom. Why do I put myself through this!?

And no, it's not about the "likes" on Instagram either.

I was reading with "She Reads Truth" this morning about Tabitha. God raised her from the dead. Did you know that? A woman named Tabitha (also translated as Dorcas) is mentioned in the Bible in Acts, 9:36-42.

She made an impact on her community by doing good and helping the poor. She made robes and other clothes for those in need. When she died, her room was filled with mourners. Likely many of those she had helped. When she was brought back to life, the good news raced through her town. God used Peter to raise her from the dead. A woman who was given gifts of kindness by God was resurrected, just as her Savior had been before her. She made good use of the gifts of kindness God had given her.

I don't create for any reason other than because I have this gift that God gave me. I've been using it since I was a child, without understanding why. I do it because I can't not do it! If God cares enough about me to place this desire to create within me, then I owe it to Him to glorify his word, and give to the needy. If I make enough money to pay for my expenses, such as printer, printer cartridges, paper, postage, website.... then I am happy. Why?

My answer was found this morning with the story of Tabitha and with the protagonist in "Charriotts of Fire". God created me to create beauty. And when I do I feel His pleasure. Because of God's great love for us, God made us alive in Christ, even when we were dead, and when I am obedient to Him, I feel his love. Yes, there are plenty of other things I'm here to do in my life, such as serve my husband and my family. But when I create beauty, I feel his pleasure.